It’s World Cup fever yet again, which is bad for blog progress because i keep alt tabbing to see what happens whenever the Spanish commentator’s voice gets excited on my pirated stream. But don’t worry, i am a man of focus, determination and i will not let anything distra… GOOOOOOOAAAAALLLLLL!!!!!!!
Started the day at Lotteria for a quick bite but Sj and Th were already done speedrunning through breakfast.
Friends who know me well will be wondering why i chose this unmanly, meatless option.
That's because i was ambushed in the morning by a forgotten konbini snack yet again. I could not help but be fascinated by this chonky salmon sushi which unfortunately turned out to be a brick of rice with a paper thin sliver of fish.
We began our day trip by taking the train to Tateyama, which is the actual name of the place and not a childish attempt at making fun of our friend.
The warning signs were there all along...
It was beautiful and balmy, which made the weathers we would face later in the day all the more surprising.
Just 30 mins later and we were surrounded by greenery. It is amazing how accessible nature is in other countries while all we have is Bedok Reservoir where people go to commit suicide.
The entire route we will be traversing today, through mountains, rivers and a smelly face.
Summer is the peak period to visit, so there weren't many other geniuses like us who came here in fucking November.
Gondolas are our preferred method of ascending mountains because we are a bunch of lazy cunts.
We then transferred to a coach for the winding road up to Genting Highlands Murodo.
It was surreal to watch green turn gradually into yellow..
..and yellow into white, allowing us to witness an entire year's worth of seasonal changes happening within a single bus journey.
The bus paused briefly midway for us to view a waterfall that was so far away that we had to squint our eyes as if we were trying to peek at some chio bu urinating.
Shortly after, we reached the highest point of our journey at Murodo. You can easily identify Singaporeans by their excitable behavior upon seeing snow, like cavemen discovering fire for the first time.
The highlight here is the snow wall formed from leftover snow in the winter, which is available between April - June.
No snow walls for us, but still a bunch of happy idiots enjoying being physically assaulted by the strong winds and snow.
白色恋人 minus the 恋人.
We took half an hour to play in the snow before finally rejoining the sane people indoors to have lunch.
The specialty of Toyama is white shrimp, usually eaten as sashimi but also yummy when deep fried into tempura.
Rest stop curry rice is as dependable as my pair of 10 year old loose underwear that somehow still manages to support my dick and balls.
Haha the bus number says BOOB. The next mode of transportation is a bus ride through a really narrow tunnel.
There is no reason why they couldn’t have chipped an extra metre when building the tunnel so i deduced that the Japanese really love tight holes.
Who needs a taller, skinnier, more handsome husband when you can have a fuck buddy like Sj?
Missing: Man in mustard North Face jacket, last seen doing OT like a dog.
It was so foggy that i thought the Indonesians were burning their forests again.
An awe-inspiring view greeted us upon our exit, the Kurobe Dam.
Built in 1963 after raping our grandmothers during WWII, it is the tallest dam in Japan and a remarkable feat of human engineering.
It stands at 186 metres tall and boasts a deeper, wetter cleavage than our resident pilates instructor.
This is probably as close as you can get to the Wall from Game of Thrones. Cue the theme song.
DAA DADADAAA DAAAA DADADA DADADADA DADADADA DA DAAAAAAAA DAAAA DADADAAAAA DAAAAA DADADADADADADADADADADA
Live enactment of us helplessly watching our Viet prince fall deeper into a NTUC fruit cutting black hole.
Took a few quick group photos so that our pregnant wildling can get through the gate before freezing her baby to death.
我们是 family (?).
Sj & Wanton Mee, toilet near Tipsy Penguin, circa 2021.
Thank god i will never have children to explain these photos and videos to.
Taking the chance to walk around like we own the dam because nobody else is stupid enough to visit during this shitty weather.
Another bus ride later and we have officially descended the mountains.
Devastating reports as the down syndrome is rapidly spreading through our ranks after 5 days of travel.
We ended our trail at Nagano, coincidentally one of the home bases during our latest Japan trip.
I love mother nature as much as the next person but it’s good to be back in civilisation where food options and toilets are aplenty.
Feeling famished, we made a beeline for a famous tonkatsu restoran near the train station.
Sadly it was dry like a nun's vagina and not the juicy pork cutlet that we envisioned.
Speaking of dry vaginas, these clitoris lookalike sandwiches were even more dehydrated.
The prawns were decent but i prefer my tempura battered instead of breaded.
Busting out the long forgotten chio bu pose while the soon to be parents were busy wolfing down their dinner.
The opening hours are short in Nagano so any shopping plans we had were instantly dashed.
However, we managed to find a great way to waste our money at a claw machine shop.
Life is often full of disappointments, like being told to wait until after O levels just to be let down.
We then discovered a 24 hour supermarket which made Jh fully erect.
Once Jh was finally satisfied, we returned to Nagano station to catch our train home.
Sj checking out the nudes sent to him by an admirer as we made our way back to Toyama.
100% real screenshot from Sj's phone (no lie).
I helped to take a lovely maternity photoshoot before ending the day.
But of course, no true day in Japan is complete without supper, and this unassuming ramen shop happened to be near our hotel.
Ordered some chicken hearts for myself 因为你们都没心了. The last comment on my blog's chat box is 4 years ago can yall buck up?
The tonkotsu ramen hit all the right spots, including my G spot.
However, Kenneth's choice of the now legendary no.9 ramen was even better. A tonkotsu shoyu broth so concentrated with flavour that it can only be created by perverts that survived 2 atomic bombs. Even our ice queen mother managed to break out a smile, the best affirmation of how good the ramen tasted. And on this delicious note, i must bid you adieu. So goodbye, mwah, and goodnight, bang!
- End of Day 5 -
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