Sawadee ka motherfuckas. Tis another day of eating, shopping, massaging and doing absolutely nothing so you can close this window now if you are looking for something interesting. This could also be my final post for awhile if the fucking kid beside me continues to run around and squeal on the mrt like a castrated pig. I know y’all would understand.
There was a stairway to heaven on the outer side of the building which was quite instagrammable albeit a little dangerous.
Chan Hong & Witaya circa 2008.
Hat Yai is famed for their fried chicken, so our first meal of the day is a healthy serving of fried pok pok keh. That’s right Turkish people, you can suck on your tahini and olives for breakfast while we have the good shit.
The roadside stall may look filthier than a Geylang sex worker but i assure you, it is one of the best tasting fried chicken you’ll ever have. The batter is crispy, the meat is succulent, my penis is erect.
The chicken comes with a side of fragrant fried shallots which paired so well with the sticky rice. Best part? This amazing tasting drumstick costs just 10 Baht. THAT’S 40 CENTS EACH. What the fuck? You can't even get a single 旺旺 from the mama diam below my house for that amount.
They also sell a bonus dish called khanom jeen, a type of thick bee hoon drenched in a variety of curries. The green curry was ultra lemak and not too spicy, while the chewy noodles were the perfect vessel to transport the gravy into my mouth. Move aside Ff, this dish has become my new love.
An amazing breakfast for 3 at a grand total of less than 10 SGD. Hat Yai truly is the Malaysians’ JB.
It’s time to visit a cafe and get coffee for the price of 12 pieces of fried chicken.
The cafe was emptier than NTUC’s toilet paper aisle during covid but the coffee was not bad.
A stray dog was kind enough to wait for our ride with us, or perhaps it wanted us to play with its rock hard nipples. We'll never know.
Then came the much anticipated activity of paying money for a stranger to touch our bodies in pleasant ways.
The room looked pretty shady but i’m happy to report that no special services were offered that day.
After a comforting massage, we headed to Greenway Night Market to see what was the hype about.
There was a massive food court so we took the opportunity to have a late lunch.
Here is a low quality, lazy food picture that is not centralised and there is nothing you can do about it.
The dishes we tried were very average so my effort in taking food pictures matched accordingly.
The sotong was especially dodgy as it resembled more like used condoms than fresh seafood.
Turns out Greenway must mean "beside Tampines MRT station" in Thai because it looks exactly like the pasar malam held there every month.
Although it was enormous, it was not terribly interesting. Just your usual knock off brand clothes, shoes and other crap.
They did serve a mean Thai milk tea although it was so sweet that my urine attracted all the ants in Hat Yai that night.
We decided to also check out the ASEAN night bazaar, another trendy night market around the area.
It was not too dissimilar to Greenway and only suitable for people who want to buy "Dolce & Banana" clothing.
Unimpressed with both markets, we went to consume some bird's saliva instead.
Seems like the spa shop we visited yesterday kept my shaved feet dead skin and sold them to this restaurant.
Never really understood the charm of bird's nest but sure, i’ll eat it if it means my skin will be smoother than baby Calen's.
I did enjoy the shark's fin soup although it is considered an unethical food item, but i'm Chinese and we eat everything from dogs to bats so it’s all good.
We had to redeem ourselves as we embarrassingly skipped supper the previous night. Luckily there were plenty of street food stalls around.
We can never say no to mango sticky rice, the absolute best Thai dessert.
I was on a roll that night, ordering stuff left, right and center until Rea and Jl begged me to stop. If the snakes were edible i probably would have dabao-ed them too.
After showering (not together), we gathered at my room to face the consequences of my over-ordering.
Oops, i may have gone a little overboard.. and this wasn’t even everything.
Took a risk and Grabfooded a very appetising spicy, raw salmon salad, an incredibly delicious serving of fried garlic mantis shrimp and a container of the most gao crab tomalley that will almost make you gag when you first put it into your mouth, but mellows into a lovely seafoody flavour. So so good.
And not forgetting the mango sticky rice for a sweet ending. Hopefully this more than makes up for the lack of supper last night.
Faces full of fear as they realised that we are going to do this for the next 2 nights as well. 你们体重没有加 10kg 我是不会罢休的. See you in a few hours for breakfast.
- End of Day 2 -
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