Central Europe 2020 - Day 3: Cluj, Romania - Salina Turda

Aaaaand we're back with more 2020 stories while i struggle to keep up with my adventures. Today my holidays officially begin as i explore the outskirts of Cluj which predictably would be ulu as fuck.

Surprise surprise, it was another gloomy, snowy day in Romania. I think I have yet to see the sun since landing here which is causing me some vitamin D deficiency.

My pad for the past 3 days was flawless, especially great at keeping out the vampires trying to fly in to suck my blood. But hey enough room talk, it's time for breakfast but none of that noob hotel spread today, let's set out to find something much better.

Stepped into this place called Vărzărie and there were 0 customers so i thought it was closed but the waitress warmly welcomed me in as if i was Jesus. I may as well be since this spinach cream with fried eggs appetiser was so good that i would reincarnate after 3 days if you fed it to my dead body.

God you don't know how much i wanted to dip my penis into that yolk right then and there.

For my main, i got some Romanian sausages which were suggestively plated alongside the breast shaped potato salad. I guess the waitress was trying to get some vitamin D too.

The problem with travelling somewhere ulu is the lack of information on the internet. I scoured through Tripadvisor for clues and managed to find the unmarked bus stop that travels to Turda. Cb put 1 sign here will die anot? There was some kind of mass gathering right opposite the pick up point, hopefully to protest the lack of bus stop signs to Turda.

But hey the bus ride was cheap and comfy although the sights on the way was sorely disappointing.

Like that. For 45 mins.

It was a quaint picture upon reaching Turda, even though its name is reminiscent of an alternate word for shit.

Brushing tiny icicles off frozen leaves as if i was tenderly playing with your nipples.

A 15 min walk and 10,000 molested leaves later, i arrived at the entrance of Salina Turda.

If you haven’t guessed it, Salina Turda is a salt mine that has since been converted into an amusement park. Is it terribly exciting? No, but it was the only thing that can be remotely considered as a tourist attraction near Cluj.

A loooooooooong ass tunnel that you can’t see the end off. It would absolutely suck to get chased by anything in here.

5 steps in and i'm already reconsidering my life choices.

Specks of salt are visible on the walls of the tunnels. Tempted to lick it but i didn’t feel like inventing a new variation of covid.

A wooden machine powered by work horses to drill a massive dildo into your mom’s vagina.

Tempted to steal one of these salt crystals home so that i would never have to buy an overpriced $8.95 salt shaker from NTUC again.

As you head deeper, you'll feel that you are heading into the earth's core and things begin to seem a little alien-ish.

Look at this sci fi looking shit at the bottom of the mine, surrounded by deep black waters where creepy monsters are inevitably lurking.

You can rent a boat and paddle around the structure but we all know that would be a very unwise move being the only non-white person in this horror movie.

But despite the initial awe at this fascinating structure, it got from 100 to 0 really quickly.

Calling it an amusement park is a bit of a stretch when all they did was add in a few pool tables.

The bowling alley was comprised of a whopping 2 lanes. Incredible.

But wait, there's also a street soccer court converted into a ping pong area! I would hate for the Romanians to find out that they have to head to the bottom of a mine to find the same amenities that exist right across the street from my house at Safra Tampines.

Greeted by a dirty furry dog as i exited the mine and made my way to Turda's town center.

It was surprisingly developed and pleasant to stroll around but the weather was getting chilly and i was getting hungry.

So i popped into a cafe to have papanasi. Nothing to do with fathers or rice, it's actually a popular Romanian dessert made of crispy doughnuts filled with cheese and topped with sour cream and jam. Nice but gam pua jelat.

After the meal, i took the bus at yet another unmarked bus stop back to Cluj and on the way i finally saw my first glimpse of sun in 3 days.

That was short lived as i returned to a wet, snowy Cluj.

Even Romania has spicy nuggets now, Mcdonald's SG please don't be stubborn and give me back my baby.

Dinner again with the company folks because i’m afraid of being alone when it gets dark. Doesn't help when the selected restaurant is located beside the old fortress walls.

Award for the most inconspicuous restaurant goes to Via. Looks just like someone's house until you actually head inside.

Turned out to be some dungeon themed restoran which was actually pretty cool.

You know it's an atas place when they provide wet towels in the restrooms.

My pork loin was a little undercooked in the middle abit gao wei but those cheesy mushrooms at the side sibei slurps man.

After bidding farewell to the peeps, i spent my last hours in Romania on a trip to the supermarket which was very exciting indeed.

Deep fried 猪油渣 that are hardly found in supermarkets in other countries.

I know you probably think i ate 2 pieces of dog shit as supper. This is actually the Romanian ngoh hiang i had during my first meal here which is awesome and something that i miss almost as much as her.

Ended the day packing and finishing up some work because i have an early train to catch the next day. Goodbye charming Romania, you and your lovely people have been more than kind 


- End of Day 3 -

No comments: