It's that time again. Another post full of sexual innuendos and filthy captions but you just keep coming back for more. Seriously man you rly hen sick i cannot... pls get some help before this addiction gets out of hand.
Ah take your time. Got bus to catch still relax relax slowly walk until almost miss the bus to Niseko. To be fair, it was a combination of packed trains during Japan's notorious rush hour, and the bus interchange being located in a fucking maze rather than us being fan jian. Thankfully, the bus conductor gave us enough grace period because i promised him a blowjob. Gomenasai arigato khuzaimah.
3 years ago, we were blessed with the presence of a random taoist priest on a bus in Japan.
The outskirts of Sapporo are ulu af just like my current love life.
Winter makes you want to pee alot, so it was a good thing that there was a designated rest stop practically in the middle of nowhere. Ever the opportunists, we took this chance to grab some breakfast from the convenience store.
When you have no customers to serve, can't use your phone during work and don't know what to do with your life.
There's something about convenience stores that attracts us like bees to honey, even if they brutally hang creepy looking soft toys at the entrance. We Grab™-ed some sandwiches and water to sustain our stomachs for the remaining journey.
Thank god Kl's mouth was stuffed with balls for a short while because getting isolated with him for a few hours was pure torture.
Say hello to Niseko! Quaint little ski town with an air of mystique, stunning even if Mt. Yotei was being shy during our first meeting. Dropped off our luggage at the hotel which we'll touch more on later. First, let's find something to warm our tummies.
Temperatures at Niseko usually range from 0 down to -15°C in March. We were being gently pelleted by soft snow while searching for A-Bu-Cha 2, a refuge for starving skiers and snowboarders.
Apparently it's also popular with teddies. Their signature mascot is a drunk teddy knocked out on their bar. At least he doesn't need anyone to help him pee when he's drunk.
Menu was pretty limited and the prices here are generally higher than Sapporo due to its resort status, but not to the point of it being unreasonable.
"When in Hokkaido, drink draft beer like it's water." - the alcoholics that i'm travelling with.
Never 干杯 one next 10 years no gf
Reagan had yet to take a shit throughout the past 4 days in Japan, so he resorted to ordering a salad to combat his constipation. It not only worked, this tuna salad with tofu and sesame dressing was surprisingly yummy.
"Baked Hokkaido Potato with Butter" actually tastes like any other baked potato. The word Hokkaido just glorifies its 550 yen (SGD$ 6.80) price tag.
Our salmon nabe hotpot wasn't great. The salmon had a fishy taste and the soup lacked depth to it as the mild flavoured ingredients like tofu and Kl's favourite corn didn't help. Pls someone throw in a packet of maggi curry MSG powder to save it.
I really liked the beef sukiyaki though. A total contrast from the other soup base, it felt like someone punched me in the face each time i took a sip. Very savoury and intense.
Now for the most challenging part, staring at our 2 massive pots and resisting the urge to attack them before they boil. Only one thing to do while we wait..
Hip xiong time! The most photogenic bunch of guys in Niseko at this moment..
..until Kl stuck out his tongue. Wow..just wow. Quite sure i just violated all the terms and conditions of blogger just by posting this horrifying image.
aaaaand now i'm getting banned by Youtube for that obscene title
What Monday blues? Casually enjoying our hotpot on a snowy day in Hokkaido while you losers have to work. (I'm typing this on a Monday while on the mrt to work ; ;)
Food was finally ready and everybody got down to business with slurps and burps.
Dipping sukiyaki beef into raw egg sounds ew but it's actually very yumz. The coating of egg makes the meat smoother and sweeter. Kudos to the pervert who thought of dipping cooked food into raw egg.
Milk Kobo is a renowned cheese tart and ice cream shop outside of Hirafu village. Fortunately for us, they opened a pop up store next to our hotel so that we could sample it. It's almost as if they knew we were coming...
I'm not kidding, really is sibei random 1 shop in the middle of nowhere.
But bringing some fresh, piping hot cheese tarts back to the hotel did sound good, and the golden rule of Hokkaido is to say yes to anything that comes out of a cow's nipple.
Our home in Niseko was the Hotel Niseko Alpen, a ski in ski out resort, which means that the ski slopes were right in our backyard, saving the need to walk long distances with the burden ski equipment.
Day 1 here was for taking it easy and there were no plans to ski, so we had plenty of time to be distracted by every little shit, like this gift shop in our hotel.
Hey... that looks kind of familiar..
We each paid $230 a night for this hotel, so we had high expectations of it. The rooms had better be good or i'm shitting all over the bed on our last day.
Ck, Jh and I were split into the 3 person room after a game of oh pay som, while a visibly distraught Yc had to sleep with Kl. Guess who got the best view?
I still get long-standing erections everytime i get reminded of it. Who knew ski slopes could be so sexually appealing?
Meanwhile the view from the other rooms were fantastic as well..
Spent some time munching into my little cheese tart while watching some live snowsports. Life's good.
Both tarts tasted very meh. The chocolate one kind of resembled milo but we'll give them the benefit of doubt here.
With the sun quickly setting, we hurried out to explore Hirafu village before nightfall.
Mt. Yotei finally decided to stop being shy and showed up. And no, you did not see me kungfu kicking Jl in the face towards the end of the video.
Ck's newly purchased white ski hat turned him into a 10/10.. cancer patient. It turned out to be a great deterrent as we thought twice about pelting snowballs at someone who looked terminally ill. The powdery snowfall increased as we spent more time frolicking in the snow.
I'm deeply sorry for hurting your eyes. This footage turned out way more disturbing than we thought it would.
一看就知道是有故事的人
The fresh Prince of Vietnam. Làm tôi trông đẹp trai ?
Yc caught his favourite pokemon... an IVYsaur 👉😎👉
People keep asking me why i'm always busy. This, this is what i do in my spare time.
People keep asking me why i'm always busy. This, this is what i do in my spare time.
Huge shoutout to Jh for pressing photo instead of video to record my first ever snow angel attempt. Snow got into my asscrack and it was freezing cold but it's all worth it as i have this awkward photo of me standing like a retard to commemorate that moment.
Good thing Ck's effort turned out fine. 有了那个 boon lay 的 Jh 就三心二意.
My n00b phone battery drops from 40% to 0% in frigid conditions, so i wasn't able to take a picture of Niseko Ramen Kazahana, the ramen place we had for dinner. Due to copyright restrictions, i can't just copy and paste from google image search results, but fret not, MS paint to the rescue.
This cosy restaurant is a must visit when you are in Niseko for their potato foam ramen. A layer of creamy mash potato blankets a hearty bowl of miso ramen, a much desired substantial meal to melt the icicles from my butt after snow angeling.
来 kor kor teach you two ways to eat this like a champ.
1) Have a mouthful of noodles followed by a spoonful of cum potato foam.
2) Mix them all together for a creamier soup base that clings on nicely to the curly noodles
Continuing our exploration of the ski village which had christmas vibes to it at night. As lovely as the view of the lit up slopes were, it wasn't great from a shopping aspect as most of the shops were selling winter gear at much STEEPER prices HAHA GEDDIT?? Cause we were on a mountain? Okay fuck you.
Something interesting i found while researching about Niseko is Bar Gyu+. The entrance resembles a tiny fridge door which posed more of a problem for the dua ki ang moh patrons than it did for us.
The difference from a real fridge door is that it's actually warmer on the other side. The bar is owned by an Australian lady boss and packed with friendly foreigners looking to unwind after a tiring day on the slopes. Feels as if you were transported to another country as there isn't a single Japanese in da house.
Afternoon drink beer, at night drink cocktails. No we don't have a drinking problem, 请不要 judge 我们.
Although the drinks were a tad expensive, it's a relatively nice place to chill. Our only complaint was the DJ who played nothing but ambience music which confused the fuck out of us.
A day in Japan isn't complete without supper from a convenience store. Seicomart's pork rice bowl boasts an egg yolk so aesthetically pleasing that we thought it was fake wew.
The clock struck twelve and we surprised Kl in his room for his birthday. As you can see, he was clearly moved beyond words. Ironically, the day he turned 27 could have been the day he died. Curious to know why? Stay tuned to the next post, coming up in whenever the fuck i feel like it!!
- End of Day 5 -
2 comments:
Bar gyu sounds like Fuck you hahahahah
Heeeeey i would Bar Gyu+ anytime too ;)
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